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Post by Aisu Youkai on Feb 24, 2006 11:33:17 GMT -5
Finally crawling out of his hole of sulking, Vergil goes into the kitchen to make a ham sandwhich. He carefully spreads just the right amount of mayo on the two slices of bread. He debates whether to put on cheese or not and eventually comes to the decision that, yes, he wants a slice of cheese. Then the ham is placed, not too much to override any other flavors on the sandwhich, but just enough to be perfect. Then he tediously cleans some lettuce and places that on. Tomatoes, tomatoes... they're out of tomatoes...! Noo....! Ok, he can do without tomatoes today. He puts a pickle on the side and some chips as well. Then he looks down at his carefully construed plate for lunch and...
Lucia walks in and steals his beautiful sandwhich.
"Nooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo.......!!!" Vergil falls to his knees in defeat and cries into his hands.
Then Dante comes in and starts eating the chips. He grabs a drink from the fridge and looks down at his brother as he continues to eat the remainder of Vergil's lunch. "Yo, what's wrong with you? Did you loose your marbles again...?"
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Post by Darkwarrior on Feb 24, 2006 16:52:31 GMT -5
"Yes. Yes I did." Vergil stated simply with as much dignity as he could muster and walked from the kitchen trying to ignore the rumbling of his stomach.
He spots Lucia on the sofa finishing his beautifully constructed masterpiece with no regard for its beauty. Utterly enraged by her lack of refinery, he jumps on her pinning her to the sofa.
Holding a plastic spoon to her throat in a threatening manner, Vergil smiles. "Payback time."
Lucia's eyes widen ridiculously in shock as Vergil starts to....
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Post by Aisu Youkai on Feb 28, 2006 11:28:02 GMT -5
(Aw, shit. You'd have to do that do me. Think, think brain, think! ... -.-')
...eat banna pudding in front of her. Yes, from out of nowhere Vergil pulls a container of pudding and carefully opens it, slowly eating the contents within, savoring each and each moment.
SUddenly Lucia has a new desire: to eat pudding for the rest of her days. So, about half way through, she dumps Vergil on the ground, banana pudding spilling all over him, and goes into the kitchen to find her a spoon and some pudding.
Unfortunately, she doesn't realize that is the last one now plastered on Vergil...
(I suck...)
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Post by Darkwarrior on Feb 28, 2006 11:34:14 GMT -5
(Nah, you don't XD)
Lucia, unhappy that there seems to be a pudding shortage returns to Vergil. Steals his spoon and throws it away, proceeding to lick the spilt pudding from his coat.
Vergil, stunned just sits there as Lucia goes to the kitchen, then returns with aa few slices of bread and attempts to turn Vergil into a sandwich.
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Post by Aisu Youkai on Feb 28, 2006 11:41:57 GMT -5
(LOL. Oh, and thanks. ^_^)
Dante walks out and proceeds to double over in laughter. Vergil just glares. Lucia is oblivious; she just keeps trying to get Vergil to fit between the pieces of bread.
Elsewhere... Sparda, Eva, Mundus, Griffon, and Phantom sit around a table holding cards. Suddenly Eva burst out with a "GO FISH" and all the boys sigh and pout.
"Damnit. How come we always have to draw a card. Do you have anything in your hand?"
Silently, Eva snickers to herself. Of course she does, eventually they had to guess right. She just never told them that...
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Post by Darkwarrior on Feb 28, 2006 11:49:18 GMT -5
(really wish I knew anything at all about card games XD)
Vergil, laying there calmly as Lucia is trying to place the bread in various different ways in the hope of making him fit, glared at Dante, who is now practically on the floor in almost uncontrollable fits at the look of concerntration on Lucia's face and the almost resigned acceptance on Vergil's. "You could make yourself useful and find something else to put in this bread for her."
"What, and spoil the fun you two appear to be having?"
"Yes, that's the idea dumbass."
"No way bro. This is better than watching car chases and explosions."
Vergil sighs and goes back to watching Lucia with slightly disdained interest.
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Post by Aisu Youkai on Feb 28, 2006 11:59:35 GMT -5
(Eheh... I couldn't think of anything better. Go Fish is a little kid's game basically... Umm... would you like me to explain it to you...? XD)
Jester walks in on the trio and immediately he sees the fortune lying there. Suddenly, before anyone realizes it, people are paying to get in and watch the show. Jester is selling tickets and popcorn like no other... and all while Dante laughs his ass off and Vergil begins to go into sulk mood. He really didn't need an audience constisting of more than his loony brother.
Eva slaps the last of her paired cards down. "I win!" She gets up and does a little dance.
Finally it hits someone. "Honey... did you always have these cards in your hand? Why didn't you ever say so? We asked for tho-- err... nothing. Nothing at all, sweetie." Sparda almost hid under the table the instant Eva turned her evil glare on him, but that would have probably made things worse. He just smiled and congratulated her.
"Hell hath no fury... even I know that one..." Mundus whispers it, but what he fears still manages to pick up on the conversation.
"If you don't get in here and clean your room right this second...!" A loud, booming female voice thunders at Mundus.
"Yes, Mother..."
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Ranka
Hell Sloth
Posts: 18
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Post by Ranka on Mar 4, 2006 0:08:16 GMT -5
"So whats the prize?" Finaly asked Eva, a hint of impatience resonating in her voice. The remark immediatly captivated her son's attention. "Prize?" marked Dante, bringing a communal sigh in the room... His brother pressed on with a nice wack of the Yamato on his twin's head, a dangerously loud echoe ringing within the ears of all that stood in the room.
"You know Dante, its no wonder the zombies turned vegetarian with you in the region." Pressed on Vergil as Dante fell to the floor after the end of the resonance. The comment immediatly rised Lucia from her seat, bursting out in all of her emotions.
"The poor things must have starved to death!"
Eva pressed on Lucia to gain back her seat as she threatened her with her newly manicured nails, hissing in the manner of a small feline, scratching away the cloth of her husband beside her.
Remaining motionless to his wife's casual behavior, he explained patiently to Lucia as he observed his son continuing his fall down the stairs.
"No actualy it started eating lemons at the shop, until the national guards of Feotuses with Shotguns showed up..."
"Oh yeah", awnsered the Koolaid guy.
(Hurray for insanity! ;D)
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Post by Aisu Youkai on Mar 13, 2006 16:59:05 GMT -5
Outside sirens can be heard. A figure in all black slinks by the camera and sighs, whispering. "Damn... they've found me." Then slinks off.
Dante gets excited as he hears the sirens, jumping up and down and clapping his hands. "Yay! It must be the people with the prize!"
Lucia starts humming a song that's anything but a song but somehow manages to go with the annoying siren's sound. "Oooo... what a pretty noise! Someone should make a song out of that!"
Vergil just goes into a corner and continues to sulk. Sparda starts running around like crazy, Eva following him with hissing noises, and begins to throw things on the ground, mostly breakables. "Gotta find orbs, gotta find orbs." He stops for a second. "Maybe I can buy off the cops with them..." Runs again. "Gotta find orbs, gotta find orbs..."
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Post by Darkwarrior on Apr 17, 2006 19:09:50 GMT -5
It turned out, that the local law enforcement didn't realise the significance of red orbs. Dante stood there indignantly protesting that they were really useful and could do loads of cool stuff for your weapons.
The policeman just stood there looking mildly confussed, then irritated. Handcuffing Dante, he turned to Sparda, looked at the Legendary Dark Knight, now in full demon mode and ran down the road.
Dante stood there handcuffed and looking somewhat bewildered. "I'm stuck." He said vaguely.
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Post by Aisu Youkai on Jun 26, 2006 21:52:43 GMT -5
(And Cel ran away with the handcuffed Dante, the end. XDD)
Sparda glanced at his sons predicament, glanced up at Dante's face, then simply shrugged. Still in full demon mode, Sparda walked off, sweeping Eva up into his arms first. Dante, left stranded, stood there helplessly.
Off in his own private corner, Vergil began scheming up a plan for revenge. And sulked.
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Post by Darkwarrior on Jul 7, 2006 16:33:24 GMT -5
Vergil continued thinking sulkily for a short while until he had an idea. He wandered up nonchalantly to the still vaguely bemused Dante and plastered a ring doughnut on his head, a stick of celery in each ear and breadsticks but his nostrils.
Before Dante had time to react, Vergil stood back, admired his handiwork, took a quick snapshot and run off laughing.
Dante sneezed at the retreating figure of Vergil causing the breadsticks to shoot out, stabbing Vergil in the back.
Vergil collapsed to the floor in shock "Death by breadstick..." he groaned in despair, and continued to sulk.
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Post by Aisu Youkai on Jul 8, 2006 1:22:10 GMT -5
At that moment, Lucia ran up and flung herself bodily on Vergil. "Oh, no! Oh, no!!" She started sobbing. "My poor, poor, precious breadsticks..." And then, carefully, she removed them, inspected thoroughly, then promptly ate them.
Dante blinked once, twice, three times, then saw a rabbit hopping off to his left and leapt after it with a cry, "Bunny Foo-foo!"
Meanwhile, Sparda spotted his precious red orbs and suddenly dropped Eva on her ass. "I found them!! My marbles!" He quickly scooped them up and placed them in a tiny marble sack, never noticing Eva's evil death glare of shocked abuse.
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Post by Darkwarrior on Jul 22, 2006 8:18:09 GMT -5
Eva decided to settle the score with Sparda and challenged him to a game of marbles. Having won all the red orbs from him, she walked off smugly.
Vergil, meanwhile was looking at Lucia with morbid fascination as she polished off the breadsticks.
"Could you get any more foul woman?"
"Only if it involves food." She said chirpily and wandered off to find another sandwich.
Dante , having failed at catching rabbits, was now face first in a muddy puddle with the white rabbit triumphantly bouncing on his head. Bubbles and strange noises were rising from the water. If they could have been heard clearly, it would have said 'Do I look like I'm having fun?' but as it was it sounded like 'blo....*gurgle* ..wah..*gurgle* *glub* bruuu...*bubble*'
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Post by Bustahead on Jul 25, 2006 3:41:45 GMT -5
The rabbit meanwhile, got rather bored of sitting about on dante's head. It had been fun for a little while but then he decided that his time would be better spent elsewhere, like meeting OTHER rabbits and making babies.
Because that's what rabbits do.
However, at that point, a Goatling came out of nowhere, mooing and generally making a lot of noise and swept him off his feet. The goatling then proceeded to steal dante's mop and flew off.
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